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Having a Bad Time 18/11/2009

Posted by Sir Ralph in How it went on.
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The days after the turning point were hell for the three of us. We were laying the dinner table for four persons, removing one of them. I felt that our decision to part from Susan would have consequences for a long time and we would need much time to cope with them. Ruth has been suffering from a bad stomach ache and would not be able to work. Janet didn´t attend school for some days. I was the only one of us to continue working, probably to get some distraction. Things had to go on.

I visited Susan in the emergency unit to leave her some of her belongings. She welcomed me cordially. Ruth and Janet would not be in the emotional state to be confronted with Susan. They have my sympathy.

Susan made a relaxed, or should I say, weary impression on me? No, not really. She seemed calm, but not depressed. She made contact with the other youngsters in her group; she is the youngest. Still, it is obvious to me that for Susan parting from us meant yet another situation of abandoning ties to persons with a strong influence on her life. I only can hope that there will be professionals to help her get over the parting and her trauma. And I would do what I could to minimise the consequences. This is my firm resolution.

Fortunately, the youth welfare office had granted us a supervision which had already helped us on a lot. The supervisor confirmed our decision. Susan could not bear the closeness of family ties, even if she appreciated it from time to time. All the holidays in France, Britain and Austria she really enjoyed, all of our relatives and friends who had accepted her without reservation, being successful in the local spoorts club where she could really work herself out…

In conclusion: we did the right thing, and there had not been any other way. That is why she would be better off in a children´s institution like the one where she was now.